On Assimilation
By C. Naseer Ahmad
Washington, DC
‘Assimilate’ is a controversial word these days. Across the Western world, there is much angst about the immigrants – most recent arrivals. Why don’t they try to adapt? This seems to be what many anti-immigrants are saying, perhaps using different words. At the same time, there are voices in the immigrant community strongly emphasizing the traditions of the country from which they have migrated.
From a cultural or societal perspective, a usage of the word assimilate would be “to absorb into the cultural tradition of a population or a group.” Absorbing into the cultural tradition of a population or a group does not, and should not, imply that one must lose one’s identity, belief, or culture. Assimilation could be healthy, actually.
Having lived in the United States for almost fifty years, I have felt assimilation is a natural process and one that has not required me to lose my identity or cultural traditions. I do remember being asked mostly during the annual year end office parties: “Do you celebrate Christmas?” From such questions it became apparent about the unfamiliarity of fellow workers or social friends about my background. So, giving an honest answer did not upset anyone, as I recall.
Over time, as one became more familiar with the cultural traditions, it became easier to answer the question briefly and diplomatically without delving into theological issues and a lecture on history. Participating in such gatherings has been something I have looked forward to every year. But, participating in cultural or religious events has never meant becoming alienated with one’s own cultural traditions and/or religious beliefs. In fact, such interactions have not only reaffirmed one’s own belief but also found that people become more interested in knowing about cultural traditions and religious beliefs that they were unfamiliar with before.
In the forty-six years plus working in several agencies of the US Federal Government, World Bank and the private sector, I have never experienced a single event which prevented me from praying. If I missed any prayers, it was always my own doing. Taking my family to Eid prayers, which quite often occurred during weekdays, has been very important to me; I have never had any difficulty getting off from work to take my family to Eid prayers.
Overtime it is natural to develop friendships through work and social life after work hours. Many times, genuine friends become an extended family. In true friendships, it is neither necessary nor required to become alienated with one’s self. Such has been my personal experience. As it became easier for me to wish my friends, a “Merry Christmas”, a “Happy Hanukkah,” or a “Happy Diwali” so it became natural for fellow friends to wish me “Eid Mubarak”, over the years.
For me, an enduring and memorable friendship was with my late friend Robert R whom I met at NASA’s Kennedy Space Center (KSC), while working on the Space Shuttle Program. One day to address a technical issue, I had to go into Bob’s office. Upon arriving at KSC, I heard about Bob possessing an ill-temper. So, it felt like I was walking into the lion’s den and I was expecting to be eaten alive but to my surprise Bob turned out to be quite an agreeable fellow who would later invite me to watch the daytime Space Shuttle launches from his office window. Years later when I was working on a US AID project in Egypt, Bob wrote me a handwritten letter which he signed with his name in Arabic. In one of his letters, Bob shared some interesting thoughts:
“… I also believe the prophets were trying to teach this message, each in their own unique way. I have always wondered if Abraham, Jesus, Mohammad, Buddha, etc. held a conference and issued a joint communique, what would it say? I would guess the message as:
- Do no harm
- Be kind
- Cooperate
- Share
- Learn”
To my mind, this friendship and the letters were mutually enjoyable outcomes of assimilation.
Enlightening evening events at ambassadorial residences in Washington, DC are some of the natural outcomes of being engaged in cultural, professional and social organizations. A few years ago, during an event at a diplomat’s residence one participant asked about the plight of Muslims in a European country with respect to the political stance of a right-wing party against immigrants in that country. Diplomats have to be discreet about political sensitivities; this is required of them. When the country’s diplomat finished discreetly answering the question, I got up to share my personal experience with the audience which was that I was recently in Geneva and had no problem offering Friday prayers in a meeting room of a public library with fellow community members in Geneva. Sharing the pleasant and genuine personal experience in Geneva and other cities like Copenhagen, Berlin, Paris and Zurich with fellow World Affairs Council DC members gathered in the diplomatic residence led to lasting friendships with top diplomats from many countries.
If there is anything that I have learned from being engaged culturally over the last five decades, it is that assimilation is not a zero-sum game.
