Believe and Be Resilient!
By C. Naseer Ahmad

The Spring 2023 report titled ‘Believe’ from the Children’s National Hospital gives the donors and supporters of the venerable health care institution a comprehensive overview. Readers get to know about ‘trail blazing treatments for complex conditions’ or ‘revolutionizing care through pediatric discovery.’ Just as important is to learn about the impact of donor support.

One learns about the stories of achievement as well as of inspiration, especially about the children who survive life-ending diseases. The report also informs us about the motivation of donors. We learn that the donors give either in memory of a loved one or because their own child was treated at the Children’s National Hospital.

“Repairing Jocelyn‘s heart” is one of the stories of life-saving care at this hospital. Without surgery, Jocelyn would either not have survived, or would have had a poor quality of life. Her story reminded me of one of my nieces, Maleeha – ‘Millie’, who is now a mother of two and a very successful schoolteacher who reviews children’s books. Had she not had a similar surgery when Millie was barely one year old at the Fairfax Hospital in Virginia, her life could have been just pain and suffering. It is possible that readers could have similar stories to share.

In this report there are stories of resilience, highlighting the treatment of kids with asthma. According to the Center of Disease Control (CDC) six million children aged up to 17 suffer from asthma. So, it is quite possible that you might know some kid who has asthma as a child. My younger son, Ali, as an infant was in an oxygen tent due to asthma in Cape Canaveral Hospital, Florida, near the Kennedy Space Center where I worked then. My older son was also admitted in the same hospital at the same time due to asthma. Ali persevered, coping with several other ailments that came along the way, to continue with his goal of helping heal other children. After medical school and residency, he completed a fellowship in pediatric critical care at the Children’s National Hospital. Ali is now an Assistant Professor of Pediatrics and a critical care physician at MD Anderson, one of the nation’s leading cancer care hospitals. Ali’s older brother Haaris is just as resilient and has become an expert in cyber security, while keeping his passion for music; his fans know him as Siraah.

Like the Children’s National Hospital, St Jude Children’s Research Hospital tries to keep donors informed. One of their recent publications provides 5-year cancer survival rates for a number of diseases for which the survival rate is around 95%.

However, for every story of hope and resilience, there could be countless children who are not alive today. Sadly, there are untold number of children who neither have access to medical care and/or the nutrition to survive and grow.

Adversity in the form of disease does not make appointments to appear in our lives; it is merciless and strikes at the most in opportune times. Parents can bear unlimited pain for themselves, but hardly anyone can see their child suffer. Blessed are the parents who do not let adversity get in the way of giving unconditional love to their children.

The human brain reacts to music like a drug. It also helps validate emotions and feelings. Music therapy helps children and families through some of their toughest times, says Ashley Warmbrodt, a board-certified music therapist at the Children’s National Hospital.

In this context a duet presented by ‘Alfaaz aur Awaz’ and sung by Gyanita Dwivedi and Rajesh Singh might help cope with situations that are difficult to deal with.

‘Toofaan to aayega, saagar ki ye fitrat hai’ - ‘storm shall come, it’s the nature of the sea’

‘Lehron se lareyga vo, jis shakhs mein himmat hai’ – ‘the resilient will fight the waves’

‘Tooti bhi ho kashti toh, lehron se hai takraana’ – ‘even a broken-up boat still fights the waves’

‘Aye mere diley nadan, tu gham sey na ghabrana’ – ‘Baby, don’t let the blues get you down’

Despite tremendous advancements in medicine, the outcomes are not guaranteed. Still a staggering number of patients don’t survive even when the patients fight with all they can, and the medical teams give their best.

Amtul Qudus Aziz

Readers quite possibly can recall about some loved one whom they are missing at this very instance. For sure, I can’t forget my youngest sister Amtul Qudus Aziz, whom we called ‘Baby’ and sometimes ‘Mithu’ – the sweet one. In November 1972 when I was twenty, influenza A H3N2 was spreading, and the virus visited my home. Mithu, who was 16-year-old then, and I were admitted to a hospital in Lahore, Pakistan. In the ward, our beds were barely 3 feet apart. I was released two weeks later and sat for the final BSc examinations. When I came back home from Forman Christian College that day, I saw a coffin in the garage (because the concept of funeral homes didn’t exist then) and realized that Mithu was not coming back alive. Mithu’s loving memory is always with me as with the rest of the family. Just like Mithu was Summeira Tahir, my cousin’s daughter, a brilliant student was aspiring to become a doctor but cancer took her in January 2014 at the tender age of nineteen.

Summeira Tahir

For those who have lost loved ones, it is hard to cope with the loss. The loved ones will never come back, but in spirit they are here with us. In this connection, one is reminded about some words from the last scenes in the movie ‘For Whom the Bell Tolls’ in which gravely wounded Robert Jordan, the protagonist, tells Maria, his lover, to escape mortal danger, and leave him in the battlefield:

‘I know it’s harder for you… but, now I am you also…if you go, I go too… that’s the only way, I can go … you are all that will ever be of me…go now (on with your life).’

This is true, if you have lost a child, a parent, a spouse, or a dear friend. Even if your loved one is intubated and unable to speak, they want you to go on with your life - because you are all that will ever be of them. So, believe and be resilient!