Does Anyone Really Hear Me?
By Nausheen Zaidi
US
Iam not silent. Another Muslim murder suspect. Another tragedy where lives are destroyed and fear of retaliation is in the forefront of the minds of so many Muslim families around the nation. As a human, I am sickened by the events in the news. As a Muslim, I am ashamed that our legacy has become one of bloodshed, inequity and asinine politics. Will we as a people be able to create a golden era of Islam where the meaning of peace resonates in the actions of Muslims portrayed by the media?
I am not silent, but who am I? I'm a regular Muslim woman in America with a regular life, a house, a family, bills to pay, dishes to wash, and errands to run. I've never seen a real gun. I don't even know what a gun sounds like; does it sound like the ones you hear on TV? I don't know, and I don't want to know.
I don't expect to be in the news everyday for the work that I quietly do. So, when I connect with the world through the media, it disturbs me immensely that the images I see of Muslims are those that inspire hatred and terror.
Muslim = terrorist I feel like I've spent my whole life combating that impression in my personal and professional relationships. But how do I combat it on a larger scale? Muslims in the United States have organized campaigns to fight the negative images that have permeated even the youngest minds.
We condemn terrorism; we condemn violence, yet our voices are overshadowed by individuals and groups with personal vendettas, mental illnesses, or political agendas.
Who chooses what we see and what we hear? How sad is it that when I read about a violent act, my first thought is, "Oh God! Please don't let the suspect be a Muslim!" And how my heart involuntarily sinks when it is and even worse, how relieved I am when it is not. As a Muslim, my first thought should be, "Oh God! Please give the victims and their families peace in this world and the Hereafter.
Ameen" But I am selfish. I admit it.
The other thought inevitably bursts in, like an instinctual response. For that half-second, I think of my children and my sisters and brothers
in Islam, and my spirit hurts on a level that is impossible for me to describe in mere words.
I am not silent, but I also don't walk around with a video camera and a microphone that provide me the platform to regularly appear in everyone's home at a scheduled time. Is that what is left for me to do? Should I upload my daily life on YouTube so that the world can see my relatively innocuous existence? Will anyone even care?
The loudest voices get the airtime. How loud can I be in my 9-5 cubicle? What social message am I sending as I wait in line at the grocery story or drive my kids to school?
I am not silent.
I am a Muslim and I condemn violence! I'm saying it here said, as I've said it before.
But does anyone really hear me?
