Understanding Phobias: Finding Connections and Seeking Compassion
By Wendy Díaz
Maryland

 

Phobias come in many shapes and forms, affecting millions globally and ranging from fears of heights, spiders, and confined spaces to less obvious triggers. But where do these intense, paralyzing reactions come from, and why do they grip us so tightly? The answers may shock you. Before discussing phobias, let’s look at a couple of examples.

Scenario 1

Anisa and her friend Isabella had just stepped off the subway in Washington, DC when they approached the busy escalator. The two friends stood side by side chatting casually as they ascended. Midway up, a sudden wave of dizziness hit Anisa. She glanced at the descending passengers on the opposite side and a jolt of vertigo seized her. Her heartbeat surged uncontrollably, and she gripped the railing with a trembling right hand. Her palms became sweaty against the metal as her breath quickened into shallow gasps. She grabbed Isabella’s arm and, barely able to speak, whispered, “Hold on to me!” Isabella turned in shock to find her friend’s face drained of color, her lips pale, and legs wobbly. Anisa clung to the railing as if her life depended on it. When they finally stepped off the escalator, Isabella guided her to safety and asked, “Are you okay?” It wasn’t until her breathing slowed and the color returned to her face that Anisa realized something startling: she had just inherited her mother’s fear of escalators.

Scenario 2

Not far from the city, in a quiet Northern Virginia apartment, newlyweds Amr and Shaima were curled up on the couch, enjoying their favorite show. As they laughed at a scene, Amr’s eye caught a sudden movement across the kitchen floor. He leaped up, eyes wide, his voice tight with alarm. “What was that?” he demanded. Shaima strolled casually into the kitchen, glancing around. When she bent down near the refrigerator, her suspicions were confirmed. “It’s a mouse,” she called back. “We’ll call maintenance tomorrow.” She turned, expecting her husband to shrug it off, but instead, she saw him recoiling, his face contorted in horror. “No, no, no,” he gasped, curling his legs onto the couch, eyes locked on the floor. “We need to leave. Now.” Shaima was confused. How could her husband, a volunteer firefighter and weightlifter, be so shaken? As she tried to reason with him, he confessed something he had never shared with his wife or anyone; he has a phobia of mice. It started when he was a child, after a traumatic incident in which a mouse wandered into his sleeping bag while he was staying at his cousin’s house. 

Phobias are usually unexpected, irrational, and yet deeply personal. They can strike without warning, turning the most routine moments into frightening situations. For some, like Anisa in the scenario above, a simple ride up an escalator can become an overwhelming ordeal. For others, like Amr, even the sight of a harmless creature can provoke an intense flight response. Both these stories are based on real events, although the names of the individuals have been changed to protect their identities. 

On a more personal note, I developed a fear of driving on highways in my mid-twenties – something I have dealt with since becoming a mother. While traveling far distances, I always choose back roads even if it adds minutes to my commute. When I have shared this ordeal with others, I have been met with insensitive remarks like “You just need to get over it.” But here is the thing, phobias are not something that can simply be overcome on their own. These fears, while seemingly small to outsiders, are very real to sufferers and can interfere with everyday life. 

According to medical experts at Johns Hopkins Medicine, phobias can happen in early childhood but mostly manifest between the ages of 15 and 20. 1 Parents must be particularly mindful of any abnormal reactions their children are having to certain triggers or stressors. A phobia is considered an anxiety disorder characterized by a deep, uncontrollable fear of certain things, situations, or activities. This fear is so intense that individuals may go out of their way to avoid the cause of their anxiety. Sometimes, this can result in a sudden onset of overwhelming fear, known as a panic attack, even in the absence of any actual danger. Sometimes phobias are genetic or inherited, as in the case with Anisa, or they could develop because of environmental factors. Some phobias can be traced back to negative or traumatic experiences with the object or situation that produces fear, like what we read about Amr’s phobia of mice. 

Unfortunately, the stigmas surrounding anxiety and other mental health challenges within the Muslim community often prevent individuals from acknowledging they have a phobia. They may keep it a secret and learn to cope on their own or continue to suffer in silence. Some Muslims with phobias worry about being judged or that their irrational fears reflect a weakness in their religious resolve, especially when they are taught “not to fear anything or anyone besides Allah.” The misconception that fears unrelated to the spiritual fear and love of the Divine are sinful or a sign of deficient faith is deeply flawed. 

Phobias are psychological conditions that require understanding and care, not judgment or misplaced assumptions about religiosity. In fact, many of the prophets and righteous people mentioned in the Qur’an experienced fear and were not reprimanded for doing so. The Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, recommended certain supplications to ward off depression, anxiety, and phobias – acknowledging that they are real human emotions that even warrant Divine intervention. 

Details about Phobias

With phobias being such a common mental health problem globally, it is important to understand what they are, the symptoms, and how to care for those in our families, friendship circles, or communities who may be experiencing them. 

Harvard Medical Publishing identified three types of phobias: 

• Specific or simple phobias are the most common type of phobia, involving intense fear of specific animals, environments, or situations (e.g., snakes, heights, flying). They can be genetic and often run in families. They can also be learned behaviors such as a fear of dogs developed due to misconceptions around the Islamic rulings involving canines. 
• Social phobia, also called social anxiety disorder, is characterized by a fear of social situations where one may feel judged or embarrassed. This apprehension may lead to an avoidance of events like public speaking or even eating in public. It is associated with childhood shyness or negative social experiences. Social phobia seems to run in families with people who have been timid or solitary as children or have a history of negative experiences in childhood.
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• Agoraphobia is a fear of being in public spaces where escaping might be difficult, such as crowded places or public transportation. This condition is often linked with panic attacks and can lead to severe avoidance behaviors. 2
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Here is a list of symptoms that a person who is suffering from a phobia or phobias may experience, including physical, psychological, and spiritual symptoms:

Psychological symptoms include:

• Persistent, excessive fear or anxiety triggered by a specific object, activity, or situation
• Irrational or disproportionate fear, even when there is no real threat
• Avoidance of phobia triggers, accompanied by shame or embarrassment about the exaggerated fear

Physical symptoms include:

• Tremors, heart palpitations, sweating, and shortness of breath
• Dizziness, nausea, or other symptoms reflecting the body's "fight or flight" response

Spiritual symptoms include:

• Feelings of guilt or inadequacy, where the phobia might be misinterpreted as a lack of faith or trust in Divine protection.
• Internal conflict between recognizing the irrational nature of the fear and the belief that faith should alleviate such fears. In other words, a person may ask, “If I’m a true believer, then why do I feel this way?”

Fortunately, Muslims facing phobias have various avenues for addressing their fears including:

• Consulting a doctor is crucial for obtaining an accurate diagnosis and a tailored treatment plan.
• For those hesitant to pursue conventional medicine, options like cognitive behavioral therapy and exposure therapy can effectively manage phobia triggers without the need for medication.
• Additionally, confiding in family members or close friends can provide emotional support and lessen the stigma associated with mental health challenges. 
• Participating in support groups fosters a sense of community and shared experience, helping individuals realize they are not alone in their struggles. 
• Turning to a trusted religious authority figure can also offer spiritual guidance to reinforce the idea that seeking help is a sign of strength rather than weakness. 
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Allah says in the Qur’an:

“We send down the Qur’an as a healing and mercy for the believers…” 

(Surah Al-Isra, 17:82)

Exploring spiritual remedies through the Qur’an and Sunnah can provide comfort and a sense of purpose in coping with phobias. Reading the Qur’an is a healing that may provide relief to someone suffering from an anxiety or a panic attack. Additionally, saying regular dhikr and even using a masbaha or a counter during this practice can provide a useful distraction. Last but not least, prayer and supplication present opportunities to connect with Allah and leave the fears of the world behind. 

One beautiful dua the Prophet Muhammad, peace and blessings be upon him, taught one of his followers who was overcome by anxiety was: 

“Say in the morning and evening: O Allah, I seek refuge in you from worry and sadness. I seek refuge in you from weakness and laziness. I seek refuge in you from cowardice and miserliness. And I seek refuge in you from being overwhelmed by debt and the tyranny of men.” 

(Sunan Abu Dawud)

Regardless of what steps a person suffering from a phobia is taking to care for themselves, it is equally important for those around them to be compassionate and supportive. Phobias are genuine fears that can happen to anyone and significantly impact a person's life. People like Anisa and Amr should never be dismissed or ridiculed. It is the Prophetic example to protect our most vulnerable – to show mercy to those on Earth if we expect mercy from the Most High.

By fostering an environment of empathy and support, friends, family, and community members can help those struggling with phobias feel safe and understood. Together, we can break down the barriers surrounding phobias and promote healing through understanding, compassion, and love.

End Notes

1  Phobias | Johns Hopkins Medicine

2  Phobia - Harvard Health

(Wendy Díaz is a Puerto Rican Muslim writer, award-winning poet, translator, and mother of six (ages ranging from infant to teen). She is the co-founder of Hablamos Islam, a non-profit organization that produces educational resources about Islam in Spanish (hablamosislam.org). She has written, illustrated, and published over a dozen children’s books and currently lives with her family in Maryland. Follow Wendy Díaz on social media @authorwendydiaz and @hablamosislam. https://www.soundvision.com/article/understanding-phobias-finding-connections-and-seeking-compassion )