Brotherhood and Sisterhood in Islam
By Dr. Muzammil H. Siddiqi
وَاعْتَصِمُوا بِحَبْلِ اللَّهِ جَمِيعًا وَلَا تَفَرَّقُوا وَاذْكُرُوا نِعْمَةَ اللَّهِ عَلَيْكُمْ إِذْ كُنْتُمْ أَعْدَاءً فَأَلَّفَ بَيْنَ قُلُوبِكُمْ فَأَصْبَحْتُمْ بِنِعْمَتِهِ إِخْوَانًا وَكُنْتُمْ عَلَى شَفَا حُفْرَةٍ مِنَ النَّارِ فَأَنْقَذَكُمْ مِنْهَا كَذَلِكَ يُبَيِّنُ اللَّهُ لَكُمْ ءَايَاتِهِ لَعَلَّكُمْ تَهْتَدُونَ(آل عمران 103)
And hold fast, all together, by the Rope which Allah (stretches out for you), and be not divided among yourselves. And remember with gratitude Allah's favor on you; for you were enemies and He joined your hearts in love, so that by His Grace, you became brethren; and you were on the brink of the Pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus does Allah make His Signs clear to you: that you may be guided.
(Al ‘Imran 3:103)
إِنَّمَا الْمُؤْمِنُونَ إِخْوَةٌ فَأَصْلِحُوا بَيْنَ أَخَوَيْكُمْ وَاتَّقُوا اللَّهَ لَعَلَّكُمْ تُرْحَمُونَ(الحجرات 10)
“The Believers are but a single Brotherhood: so make peace and reconciliation between your two (contending) brothers; and fear Allah, that you may receive Mercy.” (al-Hujurat 49:10)
The words brother ‘akh’ plural ‘ikhwah’ or ‘ikhwan’ are primarily used in the Qur’an to describe the blood relationship between siblings. It also means ‘associate, partner or equal.’ When the Qur’an uses this word to describe relations between Muslims, it gives several meanings. It means that Muslims should practice equality, unity and solidarity among themselves. It also means that the love, affection, and loyalty that exists among the blood brothers should be also exist among the people of Faith (Iman) and Submission to Allah (Islam). Islamic brotherhood transcends all differences of colors, races, nationalities, or linguistic differences. The beauty of the word ‘akh’ is that it generates the desire of equality and justice as well as it evokes the feelings of love and affection . Among the early Muslims this brotherhood and sisterhood became so strong, through their deep faith, that Allah counted it among His favors and blessings.
It is reported in a Hadith :
عن عَبْدَ اللَّهِ بْنَ عُمَرَ رَضِيَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُمَاُ أَنَّ رَسُولَ اللَّهِ صَلَّى اللَّهُ عَلَيْهِ وَسَلَّمَ قَالَ الْمُسْلِمُ أَخُو الْمُسْلِمِ لَا يَظْلِمُهُ وَلَا يُسْلِمُهُ وَمَنْ كَانَ فِي حَاجَةِ أَخِيهِ كَانَ اللَّهُ فِي حَاجَتِهِ وَمَنْ فَرَّجَ عَنْ مُسْلِمٍ كُرْبَةً فَرَّجَ اللَّهُ عَنْهُ كُرْبَةً مِنْ كُرُبَاتِ يَوْمِ الْقِيَامَةِ وَمَنْ سَتَرَ مُسْلِمًا سَتَرَهُ اللَّهُ يَوْمَ الْقِيَامَةِ (البخاري 2262)
Abdullah ibn ‘Umar reported that the Prophet –peace be upon him- said, “Every Muslim is the brother of every Muslim . He does not wrong to him, or gives him up (to be wronged by others). Whoever is engaged in his brother’s need, Allah will be engaged in his need. Whosoever will remove a difficulty of a Muslim, Allah will remove some of his difficulties on the Day of Resurrection. Whosoever will cover (the mistake of) a Muslim, Allah will cover him on the Day of Resurrection.
(al-Bukhari 2262)
The whole Shari’ah of Allah promotes brotherhood. Our ‘Ibadat promote brotherhood. When we stand together shoulder to shoulder in our congregational prayers, we learn solidarity and brotherhood. When we fast together in the month of Ramadan , when help the poor and needy through our Zakat and Sadaqar, when Muslims come together from all parts of the world to perform Hajj ; through all these acts we worship Allah, but we also learn and strengthen the bonds of our brotherhood and sisterhood. All other rules and laws of Islam are to enhance and promote a united and brotherly community among Muslims.
Imam Ghazali (d. 1111) was one of the greatest moral teachers and thinkers in Islamic history. In his Ihya’ Uloom al-Din he has a long section on the duties of brotherhood in Islam. He has mentioned eight duties that brotherhood requires:
1. The Financial Assistance: This means assisting the brother in his material needs. Here he says there are three degrees of assistance. A) Attending to his needs from your surplus. B) Placing the brother on the same footing as you yourself and sharing with him. C) Preferring your brother to yourself and setting his needs before your own.
2. The Personal Assistance: This means helping him physically and attending to his needs. It means helping him when he asks for help, but also regularly checking and finding out whether the brother needs anything and giving help without waiting to be asked.
3. Hold your tongue against him: This means that one should be silent from mentioning the shortcomings or mistakes or backbiting or unnecessary criticism.
4. Speaking out: Use your tongue to express affection. Ask about his circumstances. Praise him for his good qualities, his children, his family, his skills, his good actions, his intelligence, his character etc. without lying or exaggeration. Thank him for what he does on your behalf even for his intention if he does not succeed completely. Defend him in his absence when he is abused or his honor is impugned.
5. Forgiveness : Forgive him on his mistakes and failings. Accept his apologies if he apologizes. Do not allow the problems to continue for too long. Resolve the difference within three days and patch up as soon as possible.
6. Du’a: Make du’a for your brother, during his life and after his death. Pray that he may have all he wishes for himself and for his dependants. Pray for him as you pray for yourself.
7. Loyalty and Sincerity: Loyalty means consideration of his relatives and dependants. Loyalty also means not to listen to the gossip against your brother. Sincerity means giving him good advice and protecting him from wrong doings and sins.
8. Do not give him discomfort and inconvenience: Do not ask him for help with money or influence. Do not make too many demands from him or ask him to do too many things for you. Certainly do not demand him to do wrong things for you. Do not make him embarrassed or oblige him to make apologies for you or because of you.
Imam Ghazali spoke of brotherhood here on the micro level, that is on the individual level and in our personal relations we should observe these duties. There is also a great need of developing Ukhuwwah consciousness on the macro level or the Ummah level. All Muslims are brothers and sisters to each other, regardless of races, colors, ethnic or language differences. This means full cooperation and solidarity among Muslims all over the world on the social, economic and political level. Muslim Ummah has great potential, but it is very much lacking Ukhuwwah consciousness. All the duties of brotherhood that Imam Ghazali mentioned on the micro level can be enlarged and made into principles and policies of interrelations among Muslim organizations and states. However, we must remember that no macro change can come without micro change. May Allah help us to practice brotherhood in our personal relations with each other and promote it throughout the world. Ameen.
(Khutbah at ISOC – Rabi’al-Thani 14, 1430/ April 10, 2009)
