Believing Men and Women are Awliya’ of Each Other
O mankind! Be mindful of your Lord, who created you from a single Person, created, of like nature, his mate, and from them twain spread out many men and women. Be mindful of Allah, through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (be mindful of) the wombs (that bore you); indeed Allah is watching over you. (Al-Nisa’ 4:1)
Allah, through Whom you demand your mutual (rights), and (be mindful of) the wombs (that bore you); indeed Allah is watching over you. (Al-Nisa’ 4:1)
Allah says in the Qur’an that He created men and women both from one single nafs. Nafs can be translated as “a person or a soul.” All human beings whether males or females or nations and tribes are one and the same in their origin. They both came from same parents and their parents, Adam and Eve, both came from one single “nafs.” It is reported that the Prophet – peace be upon him - used to recite this ayah very often when he used to give his talks and speeches. This ayah emphasizes both human unity as well as gender unity. No human unity can be achieved without gender unity.
No human society can be good and successful where there is no equity and balance in the growth and development of both genders. Attention must be paid to the physical, mental, moral and spiritual development of men and women both and equal emphasis should be placed on their education. The genders are different and each has its own significant role in the society but they are also partners and they complement each other. Islam teaches Haya’ (modesty), Hijab (proper dress) and sexual morality but it does not exclude the genders from each other, nor does it ignore the growth and development of one at the expense of the other.
The good society is not the one where males or females dominate over each other or compete with each other; but it is a society where both support each other in good works.
Allah says:
The Believers, men and women, are protectors, one of another: they enjoin what is good, and forbid what is evil: they observe the prayer, give charity, and obey Allah and His Messenger. On them will Allah pour His Mercy. Allah is Exalted in power, Wise. Allah has promised to Believers - men and women - Gardens under which rivers flow, to dwell therein, and beautiful mansions in Gardens of everlasting bliss; and the greatest of all is the approval of Allah.That is the supreme felicity. (Al-Tawbah 9:71-72)
The Qur’anic principle is that believing men and women are “protectors (awliya’) of each other.” Allah did not say in the Qur’an that believing men are the protectors of believing women or vice versa; rather the walayah is the responsibility of both of them and they both have to exercise this walayah in a collective manner. What is Walayah? It is the relationship of mutual help, support and cooperation. It is mutual trust and mutual responsibility. This comes by commanding what is right and forbidding what is wrong, performing prayers, giving Zakat and obeying Allah and His Messenger. Such people receive Allah’s mercy and love. Such people have Allah’s promise of approval and eternal bliss in the Gardens of Paradise. Describing the qualities of the good men and women Allah says:
For Muslim men and women, for believing men and women, for devout men and women, for true men and women, for men and women who are patient and constant, for men and women who humble themselves, for men and women who give in charity, for men and women who fast (and deny themselves), for men and women who guard their chastity, and for men and women who engage much in Allah’s praise, for them has Allah prepared forgiveness and great reward. (al-Ahzab 33:35)
Allah has mentioned here ten qualities. These are the most important qualities of Islam. They include belief, worship, ethical and moral discipline and interpersonal relations. Allah has mentioned men and women together; because neither men can achieve these qualities by themselves, nor women can do that by themselves. They need each others cooperation and full support. Let us look at these qualities:
1. Muslim: A Muslim is a person who continuously and consistently surrenders his/herself to Allah.
2. Mu’min: A faithful person lives with and in faith. Iman requires conviction and sincerity of the heart.
3. Qanit: This is a person who is humbly devout and is always aware of Allah.
4. Sadiq: This is a truthful and sincere person. This person always speaks the truth and never tells a lie.
5. Sabir is a person who is patient and steadfast in the situations of difficulties and trails.
6. Khashi’ is a person who has a great awe and reverence for Allah. Those who have Khushu’ in their life do not become arrogant or boastful people. They do good deeds but their good deeds make them more humble and kind towards others.
7. Mutasaddiq is a person who is always generous and gives in charity. This quality comes when a person cares, loves and respects others.
8. Sa’im is a person who fasts. Literally it means “to abstain and to control”. Fasting is not only avoiding food or drink; it also means self-discipline and self-control
9. Hafiz al-Farj is a person who is very conscious of his/her sexual morality. This means both avoiding the illicit sexual relations as well as improper behavior in dress, walk and talk.
10. Dhakir Allah is a person who remembers Allah always and never forgets Him. People generally mention that which they love very much. The believers love Allah and so they talk about Him and they keep Him in their minds.
